Thursday, July 29, 2004


I've been doing some reading lately, and after a long time i've been thinking about what i learned in history class, one of my least favorite subjects...there's a theory i came across, "cognitive dissonance", big words that i'll just tell you how i take it to mean and use it thus.  To me it means, simply, interpreting the events of the past using the standards, morals, and acceptableness of today.

In school, I learned to admire, people like thomas jefferson, george washington, or woodrow wilson.  We look back on things like slavery, segregation and if you care to look closer, many other effects of racism that were institutionalized.  Today, looking back, we call those events and institutions dispicable, as they certainly are, but many of the signers of the declaration of independence were slaveowners.  My point is that that was "ok" then.

What will my generation be remembered as?  Why is it not shocking to me to know that when i look for a job, I'll be more likely to get that job and hire paid than if i were a woman.  Today, the door of opportunity opens wider and faster for men than it does for women.  I read what i just wrote and am not shocked, because that's the way it is.  Why am i not shocked and appauled?  Are you?  Will this sentiment be thought of as dispicable?  Why isn't it now?

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

5 minutes from the edge

everyone around me has a different way to manage stress, handle anger, deal with criticism, etc...
and they seem to work for everyone in their own way.  for me, lately, i've been try to wait 5 minutes, it does wonders.  It's amazing that as a general rule, 5 minutes from now things are better than they were 5 minutes ago...
just knowing if things aren't well, in 5 minutes they'll be better makes me appreciate just how much i have. 

take 5.

Thursday, July 22, 2004

For me to poop on!

Or to be pooped on rather.  That was my thanks for playing with a baby recently, great!  I later would help change the diaper, and by help i mean distract the baby while someone else changed her, thinking to myself the whole while, man it smells like well...crap in here.  Everyday this baby's parents, and everyone else who raises their kids in the world stand down wind and wipe off mountains of crap...they wash, clean, soothe, listen, instruct, play with, and raise their children everyday.

Why do they do that thing...oh yeah, love...their children so much.  Something a new mother said to me recently gave me a little perspective.  She went to see a movie for the first time after having a baby and she freaked out a little, in my closed-mind i thought, "what's your problem?  it's only 2 hours!"... She said, "i haven't been away from this kid since it was..." and i was expecting her to say born, but she finished the sentence "concieved"...never really thought of it that way before, i can more understand why parents love their children, but I probably only have the slightest inkling.

I appreciate parents, mine own and yours, in a new light as a child, an uncle, a new husband, and someday a father.  YOU have someone who has put up with a whole lot of your crap...and quite literally too.

Monday, July 19, 2004


Well, I'm officially on the bandwagon...I have a blog.
why?  i don't know, i don't really consider myself a writer.  From time to time i have things on my mind that i want to get out.  why not? 
i think i'll give this writing business a try because i am thinking it doesn't have to really be that good to write it down.
for that matter
it doesn't have to be that profound to make you think, or
it doesn't have to be that kind to be appreciated, or
it doesn't have to be much to make a difference.
and so it begins...