Guaranteed

There's no reason to rush.  I'm in the midst of being bogged down by tasks and to-dos.  I'm finally taking a moment this week to STOP doing stuff.  It has been a week full of work and tasks.  Even the stuff that seems like it should be a break isn't because I'm thinking of the next thing and trying to get through it.  That's dumb.  Enjoy the thing then do the next thing.  Remember Taher that they are get-to-dos.

There's always something competing for our attention.  Moula never wants us to rush.  There's always something to rush to like a task or a chore so that I can relax.  Again, that's dumb.  In economics terms, there's always an opportunity cost.  Always.  Afterall, the hurry is rushing from something.  Just stop to ask, what am I rushing from?  

There is no guarantee of time.  This is easy to say and easy to understand, but hard to internalize.  A favorite movie of mine has a line that is stuck in my brain.  It is so wise when I think about it.  "No amount of money ever bought a second of time."

Taher, do the thing because there is no guarantee.

Scenic Route

Work is busier than I'd like.  This has happened before and it'll happen again.  I'm sure that it's a common experience.

I had the chance to go harvest some stuff and eat it for lunch.  It was so satisfying.  My garden is literally bearing fruit.  Well vegetables, so not literally I guess.  It put work into focus for me.  I'm taking a break and not doing any.

I was reading a book that made an analogy that people were walking on a path.  I didn't get it then, but I do now.  I love gardening:)  I remember listening to this beautiful song about walking on a trail.  The people and the views changed along the way and the grass grew tall behind.  We're all walking on a path.  The view will change.  

The thing that I got today is that the trail goes to the same place for everyone. We just don't know when we'll get there.

Taher, take the scenic route.  The views are better.

Hiking

It's more often that I just sit and observe these days.  It's sometimes harder to sit and be still.  If I'm honest, sometimes it's easier to sit and not do the thing.  

I love being in nature.  I love just sitting and appreciating it.  Sometimes just sitting is the way to do that.  Sometimes it isn't though.

Hiking isn't nearly as easy for me as it used to be.  It's just not my thing anymore and that's fine.  Yesterday though, I went on a hike here in the Smoky Mountains.  It was hard.  I tried it anyway.  It was beautiful.  It was worth it.  Not because it was beautiful though.

I needed help, but I've accepted that I need help for things.  Yusuf was helping me.  He was going at my pace and was so aware of what I needed.  It was almost magical that he was anticipating what I needed.  I can't even articulate what I need.  I was feeling so proud.

This is the thing that made it most worth it though.  Just as I was thinking to myself how proud I was, he said, "Abba, I'm proud of you.  I know this is hard for you and you're doing it.  I'm so lucky to have an abba like that".  Wow.

Taher, do the hard thing.  The kids are still watching.

Know

They usually know. And they’re doing exactly what they’re supposed to be doing. 

It’s easy to criticize. Often, I criticize those closest to me. It almost doesn’t make sense. I don’t want to enumerate anything because it’s embarrassing. I know though.

It’s easy to be critical. And fool yourself into thinking you’re being helpful. That person needs to be more active for their own health. It’s easy to think, let me tell them to exercise or let me get them something that’ll make it easier for them to be active. It’s kinda insulting; it can easily assume they’ve never thought of that. Doing that can add a pressure. That isn’t the intention, but it happens. 

They probably know already. Cut them slack instead of being “helpful”. Go with them. Be part of whatever it is. Assume they know.  Otherwise, it may not be helpful even if that’s the intent. Niyat matters a lot, but it’s not everything. 

Taher, choose when you criticize. They probably already know. 

Hasad

We see the screen and we see how lucky some people are. Sometimes Moula stops to touch someone and sometimes he stops to talk to someone. Naseebdar!

We are lucky to see. Our reaction (not response ) needs to be automatic and immediate. Alhamdolillah!  Great for that person. 

It happens all the time. I’ll see someone with a nice this or that, or someone commanding lots of attention, or having anything. My first and only thought should be -Alhamdolillah! Great for that person. 

Moula told us Hasad is the worst bimari.  Moula said khuda gave us hands, feet, a mouth, and most importantly iman. Then he asked biju su joweche?

We don’t look at someone with less and think - why can’t I have that. Khuda koi ne aape koi ne na aape. Khuda gives to some and khuda doesn’t give to some. Samjo to samjo, na samjo to na samjo. Understand if you understand, don’t understand if you don’t understand. 

This is my favorite ayat once I learned the meaning. It repeats over and over. It is the most often occurring.

 فَبِأَىِّ ءَالَآءِ رَبِّكُمَا تُكَذِّبَانِ 

It isn’t a translation, but this ayat basically means - what else do you want?

Taher, you don’t need anything else. You already have all you need. 

Slow

Many mornings the kids are rushing around to get all the things they need for school. It bugs me that it’s not relaxed, but I remind myself they need to get that mental place in their own time. 

It is better to go slow. It is better to leave a margin for what’s important.

Zahra and I have this running joke that’s only kind of a joke. Namaz won’t be for 20-30 minutes and I’ll stop what I’m doing with her or naturally end the conversation and leave saying “it’s namaz time”. 

Moula says to pretty much do everything thamakun si, relaxed. He also says aram si roo ane kush haal si zindigi guzaro. Live comfortably/peacefully/slowly and happily. These are not separate and certainly not in conflict. Live slowly so that you can be happy AND live happily so that you can live slowly. They are intertwined. 

Moula never wants us to rush. If it takes 5 minutes, take 7. Be happy. Be slow. As Moula has told us, it takes discipline and focus. 

Taher, be the early bird. 

Awal waqt

Literally awal waqt means first time. I think it’s a concept though. 

Doing the right thing is always right. Giving a hug, showing love, doing namaz, and many many other good things. 

Moula did a riwayat today I’ve heard before, but learned a new layer today😁  A man who did namaz awal waqt was late to namaz.  It wasn’t the awal waqt.  He got distracted and waited until the very last moment to do namaz. He wanted to do wazu and instead of water he got jewels.  He sent the jewels back into the well.  He tried again and got jewels instead of water.  He tried a third time and was able to do wazu and namaz.  There’s a lot to learn from this story and the new layer for me is that doing things awal waqt is a habit that needs to be developed or a muscle that needs to be exercised.  It requires discipline and focus which Moula also talked about.

I got the Naseeb to go and take care of Nooriya and dad on back to back days. It was less than convenient for me. I was a bit annoyed at first, but then thankful I had the opportunity to be helpful. It wasn’t immediate that I felt like that, but it was close. 

When I’m patient with the kids, I always feel good. I’m hoping they do too.  Especially, when that’s my first response.

The right thing is always the right thing. Doing it first thing is better and makes you feel good and makes good memories.

Taher, do it in the awal waqt. 

Force

There’s something pulling on me all the time. Do this or don’t do that. I don’t know how to name it. 

The waaz yesterday was in part about a force. It’s a concept that was made accessible to us. Moula seemed to be describing gravity without using the word gravity. He described a force so strong that it attracts. Without it you float away.  Just like what gravity does. Not gravity. He didn’t say the word. 

Then he named it to the surprise of most. Love. Wa lad deen ilul hoob. There is no religion without love. 

A new layer became clear. Lead with Niyat or intention. 

Taher, do it with love. You’ll never float away.